As heretical as it may sound, hearing God say, “It’s all about you” was liberating. For Christians, there are probably a dozen different ways that God’s relationship with us is not “all about us.” But in one profound way, it is. Let me explain.
A number of troubling, even tragic, things have blown apart my life. In April someone set our Oregon house on fire—a few weeks before we could sell it. After Teckla and I battling cancer, Peter dying, and doctors diagnosing Teckla with dementia, the fire seemed too much like something right out of the Book of Job. The arson was like fireworks on top of the cake of misery we had been given.
I have not asked God, “Why me?” Worse things have happened to better people. But I have been troubled by “Why them?” I have seen prayers for those I love go unanswered. And then there is confusion of how much of the crap that happens is God’s discipline, Satan’s attack, or bad luck in a fallen world. Should we be looking for God’s purpose behind these events? Is there really a difference between God’s active and passive will?
It is here that God seems to say, “It is all about you.” Without giving any answers to my questions, God declared that what is important is me becoming more like His son, Jesus. What response from me (surrender, humility, honesty) will allow the character of Jesus to form in me? This, I have come to believe, is central purpose in all God’s dealings with us.
As important as church growth is for a pastor, more important is that the pastor day by day becomes more like Jesus. Success as a pastor in terms of numbers and growth may or may not come. But nothing can stop God from making us more like His son. Nothing can stop God from giving us the mind and the heart of Christ.
I do not know why God has allowed Teckla to suffer dementia. On every level this seems unjust—cruel to her and to me. It certainly isn’t suffering that Teckla needed to become more godly. God has not answered the why question, but His answer to the what question is the formation Christ’s character in me.
Too often we ask God why when our question should be, “What now, Lord?” Regarding Teckla,God has said, “Love and serve Teckla with joy and tenderness, redeeming each moment.” Even though God’s purpose is all about Christ’s character being formed in us, the result is selfless love.
The kingdom of God is not about how much we have done; it is about who we have become. We cannot guarantee what happens to the seed we have sown, but we can faithfully sow good seed wherever we go. Many circumstances can determine whether a congregation grows or not, but a pastor surrendered to God can grow more like Christ in every circumstance. Parents can not guarantee that their kids won’t wander away from Christ, but they can live a life that embodies and radiates the character of Christ.
This truth is rooted in the paradox at the heart of the gospel: we lose our life to find it. God’s purpose is for us to become like his Son, and for even our bodies to become like his on the day we see Him face to face. The paradox is that the more we recognize it is all about us, the less it becomes about us: our success, our knowledge, and our goals.
All this matters because there are so many shipwrecked dreams, unfulfilled callings, unanswered prayers, and vexing and perplexing situations. But nothing can stop God from making us like his Son. Glory!
